Not so super mom

Ok I am lacking the “all” department. I don’t have it all together. I forget more than I remember. The kids can drive me crazy one moment and the next be the light of my day. I go from happy to mad instantly over fussing and arguing over he little nothing’s of the everyday chatter. I want them happy and if the kids feel out of place or sad I turn my world, my life and wallet upside down. In retrospect I am trying to make them happy so I will be happy. Did my parents do this for me ? I don’t think so but they never told me. I wouldn’t tell my kids. I probably wouldn’t tell my husband. Am I hiding the changes to keep more changes from happening or to make things change? Life is getting harder as we all grow up. I work toward independence with the kids then find myself wanting to rock them or let them sneak into my bed and sleep. But I know they need to be free of my watchful eyes and insistent reminders. I just love them too much.